Student Blog
Jowy

If you’re like me, it’s easy to get caught up in saying “yes” to everything because you don’t want to disappoint anyone or fall behind. But here’s the thing: learning to set boundaries has made me a better student, and it’ll make me a better clinician too.

So, if you’ve been struggling with how to say “no” without feeling guilty, or wondering how to communicate your limits, this post is for you. Here’s how I’ve learned to do it in a way that’s both respectful and kind — to others and to myself.

1. Know Your Limits First

This is the foundation of setting boundaries — you need to know where you stand. Before you can communicate your limits to others, you have to understand your own.

I used to say “yes” to everything — from extra projects to helping friends with everything under the sun. Eventually, I realized I was running on empty, and I wasn’t giving my best to anything.

Take a step back and figure out what your body and mind can handle at any given moment. Are you overwhelmed with coursework? Struggling to stay active?

Recognizing when you’re stretched too thin is the first step to saying no without feeling guilty.

2. Be Direct and Honest (Without Apologizing)

Here’s something I had to learn: You don’t have to apologize for saying no. Being honest and direct is actually the most respectful thing you can do. It’s not rude, and it’s certainly not selfish.

For example, instead of saying “I’m sorry, but I can’t help,” try:

• “I’m currently focusing on my studies, so I can’t take on any additional tasks.”
• “I’d love to help, but I really need to take care of myself right now.”
• “I’m at capacity at the moment, but I can check back in with you next week.”

You’re setting a clear boundary without feeling the need to justify yourself. And that’s okay!

3. Use “I” Statements

One of the most effective ways to communicate your boundaries is to use “I” statements. This helps you focus on your needs and makes it clear that it’s about your well-being, not about rejecting someone else.

Instead of saying, “You’re asking too much of me,” try:

• “I need to take a break to recharge.”
• “I’ve realized I need to prioritize my health right now.”
• “I’ve got a lot on my plate at the moment, so I can’t commit to this.”

4. Offer Alternatives When You Can

I know that sometimes you don’t want to just say no and walk away, especially if you still want to help. So, if you can, offer alternatives. This keeps the relationship positive and shows you care, but without overcommitting yourself.

For example:

• “I can’t meet this week, but I’m free next Tuesday — let’s schedule then.”
• “I’m tied up with coursework, but I know someone else who might be able to assist you.”

Offering alternatives shows that you’re still supportive, just not at the expense of your own time or energy.

5. Set Expectations Early

This one’s a biggie: be upfront about your availability. As a student, you’ll get a ton of requests — from study groups to social events.

Setting expectations early on helps people understand when you’re available and when you’re not.

For example, if you know you need weekends for studying or self-care, let your friends or classmates know ahead of time. That way, you’re not always scrambling to find a balance later on.

Setting and communicating boundaries doesn’t come naturally to everyone, but it’s one of the most important skills you can develop as a student and future clinician.

Saying no isn’t about being selfish; it’s about prioritizing your well-being, so you can show up as your best self especially for the people around you.

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