You didn’t come this far to only come this far

November 13, 2020
by Yna

Life Hacks

It’s Friday! Should I dare say “TGIF” when I’ll be facing final exams next week? Probably not! It’s incredibly hard to believe that we’re only a week away before the fall semester comes to a close. It’s been roughly a 3-month long semester of online classes, asynchronous lectures, countless readings, presentations, and assignments. I was so caught up in juggling all these requirements for weeks on end (plus a part-time job as a student ambassador on top of it all), that they all just seemed endless—and yet here I am, already working on completing all the final requirements for the courses I enrolled myself in. As I try to let this reality sink in, various mixed feelings inevitably surface.

Do I feel ready for the finals? Did I really learn everything that I needed to in class? To be honest, I have spent the last few weeks feeling anxious about this upcoming exam week. I had always been this very organized person who likes to stay on top of things; however, the rigorous workload oftentimes just left me feeling overwhelmed. Adding to this are feelings of loss of control brought about by the myriad of things happening in the outside world that I cannot simply detach myself from, despite just being cooped up in my room practically all day.

Somehow, I managed to pull through one day, week, and month after the other; that I had barely noticed the time swiftly passing by. As I was starting to prepare myself to study for the exams, sifting through all the course materials, I couldn’t help but question myself if I had really absorbed a whole semester’s worth of learning (I guess we’ll find out in a week or so, right? Stay tuned for my next entry!).

A little reassurance for myself (and anyone of you who needs it) would have to do for now: you didn’t come this far to only come this far! I personally find it helpful when I remind myself of the time I was in this same fearful state as I was just about to enter the program a couple months ago: being a new immigrant to this country, struggling to find a support system, adjusting to the remote learning setup—all while having to deal with problems concerning personal relationships. It wasn’t exactly the ideal way to start the semester; nevertheless, here I am, halfway done through the program!

This is not to say that I made it here all on my own, though. My ever-supportive family, my very encouraging professors who are always willing to support their students in any way, my MA1 classmates whom I constantly meet with virtually whether it’s to create reviewers together or simply hang out, and the amazing friends I met at USC Chan along the way—all have brought me here. I encourage everyone to draw strength from your support systems, most especially when the going gets tough.

Good luck to all those students taking their final exams next week! As always, Fight On!

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