Taking my first exam, more than a decade later

November 12, 2024
by Tanya

Beginnings and Endings Classes International

The anxiety that hit me on the morning of my first exam in a long time was one I had not experienced, one that felt so foreign. Perhaps it is because I was not used to it as it has been a while, and not to sound dramatic but it felt worse than going for a job interview or presenting in front of a large audience. Everything felt so uncertain and unexpected, and I, as a person who valued control and preparedness, felt quite lost and nervous.

Even the platform that the exam was on seemed foreign, with the entire exam being digitalized. This is a stark contrast from the days when my biggest worry was that I had multiple sharpened 2B pencils to shade the correct option in a multiple-choice exam. I was amazed that the paper could be downloaded before the commencement of the exam, and the exam software came with tools such as the highlighter and timer visible on your screen.

I was overcome with a sense of relief mixed with anticipation of how I performed once I saw the green screen notifying me that the submission was successful on my screen.

Given the option, I would have much preferred to have written a paper instead, as this would have allowed me to weave in my thoughts and opinions supported by evidence. When I reflected on the entire experience, I would say my anxiety stemmed from the unfamiliarity of the advancement in technology as well as the entire examination process that felt so foreign rather than the actual content. And this was yet another way for me to learn how to adapt to changes and move with the times.

If you have not been on the academic journey for some time, here is what I did to help deal with these changes. It did not remove the nerves completely, but it helped me settle into it faster.

1. Having stationaries that help with note-taking
If you are like me and prefer to organize and write down notes on paper to visualize the information learned, it will be helpful to bring some writing implements or sticky notes that you are used to back home.

2. Follow your usual sleep pattern
Hearing some of my classmates share about the later times they sleep and how they feel more efficient or productive, made me consider this choice and attempt it. I usually head to bed by around 11 pm and decided to try staying up till 1 am. Sad to say, this was counterproductive, and I was less efficient and felt even more lethargic over the next 2 days. Know your body system and do what is best for you, you do not have to change your routines despite adopting a new role.

3. Enjoy leisure amidst the exams and assignments
Along with midterms also come assignment submissions, this can be a lot, and you may feel overwhelmed by it. It may feel that every minute should be channeled to studying or reading another article, however, engaging in leisure does clear your mind and refreshes you. It is the little things that can have a greater impact.

4. Planning ahead to ensure you have sufficient groceries
I usually travel on the bus to get my groceries over the weekend, as it is nice to browse and select my items. However, it can be a little time-consuming when it is ‘crunch time’ due to the additional time spent on commuting. It is helpful to plan and purchase additional groceries with a longer shelf-life to last for the upcoming week. Another helpful way is to purchase your groceries online. There are various stores online, such as Instacart, Weeee, etc that are helpful when other factors are deterring you from going out.

5. Be a little more courageous
That’s what I tell myself when I do not understand the concepts or have questions about the topic being taught in class. It could be my personality or how I am used to academic lessons back home that make it more challenging for me to ask questions. However, I would encourage you to raise your hand and ask, or go to an office hour appointment to clear the doubts that you may have. If you don’t, the person that is at the losing end will eventually be yourself. As they say, knowledge is power, so do not leave the module with an unanswered question.

Despite various deadlines that you need to meet, it is important to stop and pause, and also look at your surroundings as you commute on the shuttle bus or to your apartment. LA has very beautiful sunsets and skies, but you will miss it if you are just focused on thinking about your to-do list.

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